Happy Mother’s Day Caroline,
I think it’s important that I share this with everyone who follows us because you are a mother by choice to our son.
I told you I had a 6 year old son before we met. On our second date I had an opening to tell you more about Gabe after you mentioned that some of your students are on the spectrum. That’s when I told you that he was nonverbal and autistic. I was scared that might be a deal breaker. We carried on as if it was no big deal. You never made me feel like it was even if you felt that way deep down. I had my hands full with Gabe. You saw that. You stayed.
As our relationship built, so did yours with Gabe. You were the one who could convince him to become “a member of the clean plate club” and then you started to read to him before bed. That was something I had always done every night of his life. It was hard to give that up, but I wanted you to experience that too. He listened to you intently as you introduced him to Harry Potter. Thank you for always presuming competence. At first I thought Gabe had no idea what you were reading to him, but as I watched him staring at you and listening so intently I knew he understood. He never wanted you to stop reading. It didn’t take long for you to read the entire series to him.
On Gabe’s 11th birthday you insisted on buying him a pedelless Strider bike so you could teach him to ride a bike. Once again I thought Gabe would have no interest or ability to do it. Once again, you and Gabe proved me wrong. That was the summer I was going through radiation treatment. Every day I would come home and ran after you two filming every second of it.
I’m not sure how old Gabe was when I asked you if you wanted Gabe to know you as “mom” instead of Caroline. Maybe he was 9. What I will never forget is how much that meant to you. I’m sorry it took me so long to ask you. You were his bonus mom way before then.
You have been in this with me for almost 10 years. These years have been the best of my life. I don’t know how we got so lucky to have found you. You are brave, selfless, kind, full of life and love. You changed our lives.
So many people would have chosen a different path. You chose the hardest one and you make it look easy.
I’m so happy that Gabe is now following in your footsteps in his athletic endeavors. Another thing about you that I am in awe of. One of my favorite things is watching you teach him so many things especially how to play basketball!
Today, I want to celebrate you. A mother by choice to a severely autistic child. You have changed the trajectory of Gabe’s life with your love and the effort you make every day. I love you and the family we have built together. Happy Mother’s Day! Caroline Kiernan #mothersday #autism
